Wednesday, March 11, 2009

Teeny-Tiny Theater

For many years, I've enjoyed reading before going to sleep at night. I find reading to be both a great stress reliever and a wonderful, economical escape. I've read all the James Herriot books, every Harry Potter installment, and so many books about renovating houses in other countries that I've lost count. I actually look forward to that quiet time at night when my mind can completely change gears.

But lately, I've been having some problems with my vision. I know that it's time to get new glasses, but I'm too lazy to take care of that as I should, so I've resorted to a new medium: compact video, in the form of downloaded movies which I play on my iPhone at night. These movies are not typically anything which you would see in a modern theater, but rather they are generally B-movies, badly-colored 70's thrillers, and the like. Many of these movies feature beasts (or people) who have been transmogrified by an overdose of radiation or by the infusion of some strange chemicals.

The other night, my wife was glancing over at me, and having noticed this peculiar habit for several evenings in a row, she asked, "What is this? Teeny-Tiny Theater?" I loved it! That term perfectly describes this latest indulgence of mine. I now have the world of substandard cinema in the palm of my hand, and I've even found myself watching it when waiting for a haircut, at the car wash, or at the doctor's office. No more fretting for me about how long it will take for Dr. Terry to see me...no way. I have the solution right here, right now. So what if my throat hurts?

Of course, I know that many of you who are keenly aware of my fondness for Bollywood movies will ask, "Isn't that what you really have stored on your iPhone?" And I will tell you no, although I do admit to having a few carefully selected Bollywood videos featuring the likes of Bipasha Basu, Priyanka Chopra, and Aishwarya Rai on there...but hey, what's wrong with that?

Anyway, it's a great thing, and I plan to continue using Teeny-Tiny Theater for a while, maybe even after I get new glasses. Wait...do I really need new glasses in this economy? I think not.